Eyore eyor oh! Employees, you now have your rights- a whole banquet of them! Here are your Zero hours. The Gig is up. Nice work while you got it. All your rights are now recognized but sadly there is no work for you now.We hope this recognition of your inherent worth and value will go some way to mitigate the fact that you are now unemployed and probably will never have a job again. Up the workers!
A i ai oh! Last time I checked the new generation of super robots will not be requiring any of the following - and please let me know if I have left any of them out: Maternity leave. Paternity leave. Transgender leave. Adoption leave (no I don't know what that is either). Sick pay. Redundancy pay. Access to tribunals for unfair dismissal. Minimum wage. Living wage. Holiday pay.Shares in company rights.Positions on boards of company.
With John Mcdonnel's employment policy announcements today it is surely now official: Labour has bought the farm.
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